


Star on Christmas Eve

by Fritillaria_Vajra



Series: Negan x Carl Alternate Universe Random Story [1]
Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Canon Setting, Canon verse, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 18:28:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21953068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fritillaria_Vajra/pseuds/Fritillaria_Vajra
Summary: Carl never thought he could have an actual Christmas moment in the Sanctuary, on his enemy base, with the leader of Savior, Negan. Unexpected changes and new circumstance happen between them in the cold winter, but would it last forever?Canon verse story where Carl was taken hostage at the Sanctuary and the story following the original events on the TV shows.
Relationships: Carl Grimes/Negan
Series: Negan x Carl Alternate Universe Random Story [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1833679
Comments: 2
Kudos: 38





	Star on Christmas Eve

**Author's Note:**

> Ayyy, I'm sorry for not long update, I'm postpone the Omegaverse Cegan fic because I want to work a Cegan Christmas fic since its my tradition to post fic of my lovely pairing every Christmas and New Year occasion, even thought I'm not Christian xD I just like to celebrate the holidays season after all <3 
> 
> Anyway, I decided to write some Canon verse setting with different direction of the story and I hope you guys will love this <3 
> 
> Warning : The fic was half un-beta, it feels forced if I split the story so I just go publish the rest story but it still not 100% proofread

Negan has always been a secretive man, there are things that nobody from the Sanctuary knows about him and probably never will. To be fair, it’s not like Negan actively keeps them a secret, he just doesn’t talk about them, and nobody asks.

Nobody knows his bat is named after his first wife, nobody knows that he used to be a gym teacher, nobody knows that he’s actually bisexual, and the list can go on.

Negan just tells people what they like to hear, and what they expect to hear from him. Everything else? He doesn’t bother, they don’t need to know. Instead, Negan puts on this strong, bravado front to emit confidence. It’s not a persona or anything, Negan has always been a very confident man, but he amplifies his egotistical nature around his group to show superiority and dominance. It works pretty fucking well actually. People either fear or respect him and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

Negan likes to read in his free time. Nobody knows. In fact, they probably assume he hates reading, that he’s not the “type” to be a book nerd because of his personality, but that doesn’t mean shit. English was always his favorite subject, and something he enjoyed other than baseball. It was actually his fallback. If not a gym teacher, he probably would have been a literature teacher.

Negan collects books if he’s out on a run with his men. Sometimes it’s because they seem interesting enough for him to read, but a lot of the time it’s because if he finds a book in a decent condition, he feels obligated to take it. And really, it’s not like he should care, but it feels like he’s voluntarily letting pieces of the old world disappear when he doesn’t take a book, and that’s something very unreasonably unsettling to him. Fuck, it feels like he’s on some Fahrenheit 451 shit here. Oh well.

maybe it’ll be important in the future—if there is one. He scoffs at the thought, but hypothetically, if there was a future for society, books from the past would be super fucking important because not only can they act as history books, but they can also teach people how to think for themselves. Books enable thought. Imagination. Opinions. To take that away, well we don’t want Fahrenheit 451 to become even more of a reality.

Over time, Negan gained a plethora of books, all of which he stored in the sanctuary. It’s gotten to the point where there’s an entire room that serves as a makeshift library. Negan didn’t keep the books to himself anymore, there were so many, he decided to share them with his people.

If anyone asked why he had a library, he’d tell them it was to keep his people happy and not bored as fuck all the time. But Negan had a strict policy on signing in and out a book. If you’re late on turning it back then you have to pay in their currency, and stealing one is punishable by iron. Strict, but hey, at least no one will fuck with his books.

After a long, stressful, exhausting day, Negan likes to just relax in his room reading a book before sleep. It’s a routine, as well as his evening smoke. Sometimes he likes to destress by getting a wife to suck his dick or something, but other times he just wants everyone to fuck off so he can be left alone with his thoughts and readings. Today is no different except for one thing. He’s finished all the books in his room, so he makes his way to the library to get a few more. Though upon entering, he’s greeted by the old woman who he put in charge here.

She’s talking 80 miles per hour, apologizing profusely for something Negan doesn’t understand. She must think she’s in trouble, but why? What did she do? Negan gets angry and tells her to shut up and explain what happened. With a look of fear, she tells him that some books are missing and not accounted for, meaning someone must have stolen them from the library when she wasn’t paying attention. She then starts apologizing and begging for her life after admitting this, but Negan isn’t listening.

One of his saviors has the fucking gull to steal from him? And a fucking book at that. It has to be a power move or something because he sure as shit doesn’t think anyone here is dumb enough to risk their life over a fucking book if they didn’t think they could get away with it. It makes his blood boil thinking that someone did this in spite; that they thought they could get away with it. Get away from him.

Negan demands to know what books are missing. The lady stammers as she lists the books.

They were mostly educational books. There was a missing book about astrology, another about astronomy, and one more about physics. They were all books related to space and science. What the fuck? That’s not the surprising part though, there’s more. The lady also tells Negan various children’s books have been stolen too. Most of them were Christmas stories. Ok really, what the fuck?

Negan pushes the lady aside, he’ll deal with her later, but for now he’s focused on the prick who stole from him. Doesn’t matter what the fucker stole, all that matters is that he stole something from him, and that means punishment.

____________________________________________

It’s funny really.

Turns out the prick who stole from him was the sheriff's son, Carl. He found him shortly after the incident on the roof of the sanctuary (it’s his go-to place for whatever reason) with—guess what?—his fucking books.

This kid has been such a nuisance ever since he’s arrived. Honestly, Negan should have expected that he was the one who stole from him. After all, he’s been doing shit like this from the start: provoking his men, stealing things, sputtering sassy comments at Negan under his breath, he even tried to stab him with a butter knife once when he first got here. Negan put him in solitary for a week after that one.

The kid was a major fucking brat, but, to be fair, he did have a reason to be.

After Negan proudly gutted that coward by the pool table, he decided to take Carl as well as that Eugene guy for punishment. It was simple to Negan at the time, take Eugene to make bullets for the saviors and take Carl as collateral against Rick; to make sure the man knew his place and wouldn’t try to do anything because he had his son.

It was the perfect plan, at least, that’s what Negan thought at the time, but seeing Carl now, lithe legs dangling off the edge of the roof with an astrology book perched on his lap, he knew he had made a mistake. He didn’t expect how stubborn and disobedient Carl would be.

It’s like Carl was testing him, like he knew Negan wouldn’t do anything to him, so he just decided to see how far he could push. Negan let him get away with a lot of things, and he told himself it was because he needed him alive, but the truth was, he had a soft spot for the kid. He was badass and Negan couldn’t help but respect his boldness at times, annoying as it is.

The longer Negan looked at the boy, the quicker his resolve dissipated. Damn, how does he do that? Negan was fully ready to kill the fucker who stole from him, but now his anger is replaced by curiosity, “Yo! So your the rat who stole my books! What the fuck, Carl?” Negan yells, walking closer to the boy.

Carl isn’t startled at all, he spares Negan a glance before going back to his book. “I was bored, so I borrowed some.”

“Borrowed?” Negan laughs, “You stole from me you ignorant slut. You know you could have just asked me for them, you just want to be punished, huh?”

Negan swung Lucille off his shoulder, “You know how thieves get punished here, right? Tell me why I shouldn’t treat you the same.”

Carl tried his hardest not to roll his eyes, “It was just a few books, stop being a drama queen.”

There was that fucking attitude again. Negan had half the mind to push the kid off the ledge right now, but he wouldn’t do that. He needed the boy alive, and to be honest, he kind of liked this game he and Carl played. It was fun but Carl usually always got his way, well not today. Negan needed to show this brat who was in charge.

The smile dropped from Negan’s face. He displays a serious, almost angry, look and with a low voice says, “Not to me. Now admit your mistakes or I just might take a trip to Alexandria and show Lucille off to one of the folks.”

Negan let the words soak in and after a brief pause he’s rewarded with a response from Carl. The boy finally looks at Negan, eyes calculating. He was seeing if the bait was serious or not, and he must have decided it was because all of sudden he clicks his tongue and closes the book he was reading.

“Fine, I was wrong for stealing from you, but I didn’t want to ask you for the books I wanted.” Carl was standing up then, collecting the books he had around him. Only then did Negan remember the type of books they were.

Negan pointed to the red picture book, “Yeah, what the fuck is that about anyway? Why do you have a Christmas book?”

Carl followed his gaze, “Oh, this? It’s… for Judith. I wanted to show her what Christmas is when I visit her again.”

Negan grinned, and walked closer to the boy. He held his chin up in a gloved hand. “Is this your way of gaining my pity, so you won’t go unpunished?”

Carl gulped. Negan could see the boy tense. “But… I admitted my mistake. Wasn't that the punishment? You can’t—”

“Don’t tell me what I can and can’t do. You thought that half assed apology would settle it?” Their faces were inches apart now. A shiver ran through Carl. Just when he thought Negan would snap and toss him over the edge, he said something unexpected. “Well then you're absolutely right! Fine, take this book, oh and the Rudolph one, she’ll love it.”

Carl was floored by the sudden change in mood. He was for sure Negan would snap.

“O-ok… thank you…” Carl looked away. He was ashamed of being seen scared like that. He should have known Negan was just fucking with him.

Negan let loose a sly smirk. The fucker. “Yeah, you can take those baby books for your sister, but I’m gonna need those back.” He points to the stack of science books, “Those are more important, plus, you can only take out two at a time. You knew that right, or did you just ignore that rule too?”

Carl pouted and looked away again. It was kinda cute actually. Negan leaned down next to Carl’s ear.

“You know… if you really want all of them, you could have them permanently if you do something for me.” Negan brushed a loose strand of his hair behind the ear, and said jokingly, “Like suck my dick~”

The boy’s eye widened for a second, before it squinted in thought. No fucking way. Was he actually considering it? He most definitely was, the look was all but giving it away. Carl had his plump bottom lip between his teeth, and he kept glancing back between the books and Negan.

“Wait, I was joking, I was joking! Did you seriously think I’d offer that to you?” Negan was laughing almost hysterically at this point.

“F-fuck you!” Carl went to gather his books and leave.

Negan thought his flushed face was adorable, “Maybe one day kid!” He called out to Carl as he opened the roof door. He caught a glimpse of Carl’s middle finger before he was gone. Negan chuckled to himself.

* * *

Carl was never really fond of working for Negan, but he didn’t disobey the man when he asked for his help on a supply run. He wouldn’t admit it, but he was actually relieved to get out of that stuffy factory, and this meant Negan was starting to trust him more. That’s good, maybe Negan will let him visit Alexandria soon.

Negan was filled with pride as he watched Carl take down walker after walker. Carl was exactly what Negan needed. The boy was talented and quick on his feet. He got in and out, and didn’t fuck around like a lot of his men did. The only thing Carl needed to work on was his aiming with a gun, but that was just because of his eye. Despite that, Carl was perfect; better than most of his men! Negan wonders, if he trained Carl more, the boy would be a killing machine. He already had the cold, calculating look about him when he drove his knife through a walker’s skull. The boy had potential.

It would be fucking awesome if Negan had his trust… Carl was fiercely loyal, and Negan needed loyal people, but Carl wasn’t loyal to him. He was loyal to his father; to his family. Negan was almost envious of Rick. He had this boy that would do anything he said. Carl could kill dozens of walkers for him, and he’d do it eagerly. He’d look up at you after, a silent question of, “Did I do good?” Or, “Are you proud of me now?” Hell, Rick could tell the boy to jump and he’d ask how high, yet Rick was too fucking dense to see it, and too fucking stupid to put the boy’s skills to use. Has he ever praised Carl? Told him he was proud? It’s probably a rare occurrence.

Negan swears, if he had the boy, hell, he’d tell him how much of a badass he was everyday.

Negan would do all that he could to sway Carl to his side. Negan was aware that Carl must be—at least— slightly interested at this point. He saw the boy’s eye fill with interest when he saw how Negan ran things, and he saw how Carl’s eyes lit up when he praised him. The boy would always try to hide his reaction, acting passive and waving it off, but Negan always caught it.

Negan knows the boy belongs here, and deep down, he thinks Carl knows too. He just has yet to accept it.

Negan wants Carl as an asset, but it’s not just that. There’s always this weird tension in the air when Negan talks to Carl, and he gets a thrill whenever the boy tests him. It was a game both of them were playing, Negan was sure of it, but there were some unexpected results from their encounters. Negan always felt compelled to touch the kid, or punish him for his attitude, but lately these urges are getting worse, and less… innocent.

The other day, he thought about pushing Carl into a wall, biting and sucking on his neck to put him in his place and show him who he belonged to. The thoughts just grew from there. It was getting to the point where Negan couldn’t even enjoy one of his wives without the kid crossing his mind.

He wanted the boy badly, but he didn’t want to scare Carl.

It was only days later when something finally happened. Negan took Carl out on another supply run to a dilapidated shopping district. It was nearing winter fast, and Negan rounded his men together to get some supplies to last them through the winter. Mostly they needed warm clothes and blankets because the Sanctuary got especially cold, but they also got more food and gear. Of course, technically, Negan could have just taken these things from the other communities, but he wasn’t that cruel, and he wanted them to survive the winter so he could still profit from them. They were no good to him dead.

Negan saw Carl looking in a bin of holiday decorations. He was really eyeing up the Christmas stuff. ‘It is getting close to the holidays, huh?’ It seemed like it, but there was no way to be sure with no track of time. Either way, Carl must have been thinking the same thing. Negan wonders if the boy misses it.

Negan makes up his mind then. He walks over to where Carl’s peering at the bin, and pushes the boy aside. He then starts to throw various decorations into a cart.

Carl blushes, staring wide eyed at Negan. He was embarrassed about being caught looking at the decorations, but he couldn’t help thinking about the possibility of actually celebrating the holiday. Before he knew it, he was staring longingly at the decorations, all while imagining having an actual Christmas with his family. He pictured Judith and him decorating a Christmas tree, and he pictured Judith's face lightening up as she opened gifts. Carl couldn’t help the small smile crossing his features, but then Negan was stepping in.

Oh no, Negan was probably gonna mock him. Carl expected the teasing to come, but Negan just slide past him and started picking out various items.

“What are you—why are you taking those?”

“Hm? Oh, I just thought we’d decorate the Sanctuary for the holidays. Doesn’t matter if it’s the apocalypse, we should live a little, don’t you think? After all, you were the one eyeing up this stuff.” Negan winks at Carl.

“D-Don’t mock me. We don’t have the time or space for all of that.”

“Actually we do because I'm saying we do.”

Negan looks on an adjacent shelf, “Hey look, artificial trees. Don’t mind if I do.” Negan chuckles to himself while going over to look, “You want a white one or a green one?” He looks over at Carl expectantly.

Carl is struck in awe, his mouth opens and closes uselessly before the words come out in a small voice, “You—you aren’t kidding?”

Negan smiles and shakes his head, “No, I’m being serious. Like I said, we should live it up while we can.”

Carl tried to stop the smile from forming but he couldn’t help it.

“Get the full green one… it looks the most real.”

It was a lot to load up in the truck, but they did it anyway, and nobody questioned it. Negan decided to tease Carl a little more. He couldn’t help it, the kid was cute when flustered.

“You don’t still believe in Santa, do you?”

Carl huffed, “Of course not! I’m not a child…”

“Well he’s real this year! I’ll be your Santa, baby. What do you want for Christmas?”

Carl blushes, “I—I don’t want anything!”

Negan leans against the truck, looming over Carl’s figure. “I know you want something. Just tell me what it is, and I’ll give it to you free of charge. I’m in the Christmas spirit after all!”

Carl looks down at his feet. After a moment's pause he begins to speak in a small voice, “I want… I want to see Judith, I want to show her…”

Negan understood right away. This boy was so selfless it was almost annoying. “As much as that shit warms my heart, that’s gonna be a hard thing to do right now with the weather and preparations and all.”

Carl started to frown. He wanted to argue with Negan and tell him to just take him to Alexandria, but he knew that wouldn’t happen, and he didn’t want to lose his visiting privileges by trying to argue with the man.

Carl kept his mouth closed.

“Although maybe you could change my mind~” Negan corners Carl against the truck, both of his hands above the boy’s head. The boy was blushing fiercely at this point. Did Carl like this? Did he like him? It seemed like it, but Negan wasn’t sure. He had to test his theory.

Carl nudges at the man. “S-stop, what are you doing?”

“This.” Negan went in. He leaned down and pressed his chapped lips against Carl’s soft ones which were somehow warm despite the cold. Negan sighed in relief. It was good, but too much at once. After a short moment Negan pulls away.

Carl’s eyes are wide, his mouth hanging slightly ajar. Was this a mistake? Negan searches Carl’s face for any sign of discomfort, but he sees none. Negan waits desperately for a response. It’s only after a moment of tense silence does Carl react, and it’s not a good reaction. He starts looking around frantically, trying to catch if someone saw them, but no one was around. It was just them.

Negan sighs, and whispers, “Did you not like that? Sorry, I won’t do it again. I must have read the situation totally fucking wrong. It looked like you were giving me bedroom eyes there.” Negan tried for a strong laugh, but it comes out as a nervous chuckle. Well fuck, this was awkward.

Carl just looks at him in confusion. It’s only then that it dawned on Negan. No fucking way.

“Was that your first kiss?”

Carl doesn’t even need to answer. His face shows it all. He looks away in shame and slowly nods his head. In a brief moment of vulnerability, Negan asks his next question. “Did you… did you like it?”

Carl seems a little taken aback by the question and Negan is too, but he doesn’t regret it.

Silence ensues for a moment till Carl breaks it. Whatever answer Negan was expecting wasn’t this.

“Yes…” It was quiet and hesitant. Negan almost didn’t catch it, but he definitely heard what Carl said next, “Do it—do it again.”

Negan wastes no time. He pulls Carl’s chin up and tenderly connects their lips for the second time. Negan pushed a little harder, seeking a response. Carl hesitantly kisses back and his arms snake up around Negan’s biceps. Negan takes one hand to hold the back of Carl’s neck in response.

Negan could tell Carl was unsure what to do. All of his movements were hesitant and the hands clutching his biceps were threatening to push Negan away the moment he felt uncomfortable.

But they never did.

“Mmhh—Negan…” Carl whimpered as they pulled away from each other for air. Negan thought Carl looked beautiful like this. The boy looked debauched, adorned with rosy cheeks and dilated eyes. This boy was so touch starved he got excited over just a few kisses.

Negan loved enthusiasm, he could get used to this, but he couldn’t push too far too fast. He wanted to make sure Carl wanted this just as much as he did.

* * *

Carl was pissed. They had a deal, but this stupid winter weather had to go and ruin it.

After the “events” at the shopping district, Carl and Negan settled a deal. Negan would allow Carl to see Judith and show her whatever he wanted, which included all the books he stole and the decorations he and Negan took, but plans changed.

The night before their planned trip to Alexandria, a blizzard swept through the area, pretty much barrackating them inside the factory. Negan announced that the trip would be cancelled as well as all other trips until the weather issues were resolved. Negan must have known Carl would be pissed at him for the decision, so he tried to surprise the boy by showing him the Christmas tree he set up in his room. Negan said they should enjoy the decorations themselves for now, and not to worry because they could show Judith at a later date in time.

Carl agreed with him, but he was still upset. He hated this weather but he also hated Negan. After that day… their relationship hadn’t really progressed like he thought it would. The only difference was that Negan let Carl stay in his room if he wanted. Carl liked sleeping on the couch closest to the lit up Christmas tree, but Negan would offer up his bed at times, so Carl got to enjoy the man’s fluffy bed as well, but Negan never entered it with him…

Surely, Negan was waiting for him to make his move, right? Probably to show him that he wants this for real. That’s what Carl’s mind deciphered anyway. After all, Carl didn’t see the wives hanging around anymore, neither in the lounge or in Negan’s bedroom. Had Negan disbanded them… perhaps for him? Carl’s heart jumped at the thought.

Though it was true at the start of this all Carl had wanted to kill Negan, he didn’t want to anymore. He stopped planning to kill Negan months ago, and that hatred turned to respect and then to… something else. He wasn’t denying his feelings for the man—he definitely had them... but he couldn’t act on them. What would his father think? Would he understand? Probably not.

Carl sat and pondered this all at his favorite spot. The roof. It was near freezing outside and it was snowing hard, but Carl needed a quiet place to think.

“Hey kid, trying to sight see again, are you?” Negan came out in a full black coat, red scarf ever present and standing out against the dreary colors all around them.

Carl scoffed, he hated to admit to it, but looking at the sky and stars always calmed him. He found refuge from this world in the night sky.

“Can you really see anything with this weather? I can’t see shit in this blizzard. There’s no point, come on, let’s get you inside where it’s warm.”

Carl remained silent. Ok, maybe he was still a little bitter about their deal. He never got to show Judith how beautiful Christmas could be despite the awful weather.

Negan must have sensed his mood, so he tries a different approach, “I’ve got hot chocolate~”

Carl smirks. His resolve breaks and without any words necessary, he gets up and follows Negan to the door. ‘Got him,’ Negan thinks. Carl was an open book sometimes.

* * *

When they make it to Negan’s room, Carl’s hands are clutching a big mug full of hot chocolate. It tasted pretty shitty, but it was the thought that counted, and Carl drank it great fully.

“I should tell my little elves to make cookies too, it’d go great with the hot coco, don’t you think?” Negan winked at Carl, directing him to sit on the couch near the tree.

“‘Little elves’ you really are in the Christmas spirit, huh?” Carl teases Negan as he takes a sip from the mug. It burns the inside of his mouth with how hot it Is, but that’s ok.

“Only for you, princess~” Negan joins Carl on the leather couch.

“How many times do I have to tell you, I was thinking about it for Judith!”

“But everyone loves Christmas, and Carl,” Negan places his hands over Carl’s still on the mug. The tone of his voice turning serious, “you deserve the best Christmas I can give.” Negan winks at the boy playfully.

Carl’s face heats up. He’s so lost in Negan’s eyes; in his words. This was all for him. Negan… he was so thoughtful when he wanted to be. Carl felt a surge of confidence burst inside him. His resolve finally gave, and he leaned up and into Negan's mouth, connecting them once again.

They both hum at the same time. Negan removes his hands and places one behind Carl’s head and the other on his hip.

Negan went all out after knowing that Carl wanted this too. The kiss soon turned very passionate, Negan added his tongue and began to lick at the seam of Carl’s lips. Carl was a quick learner, he opened his mouth eagerly for Negan, and moaned when a tongue filled it.

The mug starts to burn the palms of his hands.

Negan takes notice before he does. Carl doesn’t even process the pain until Negan is quickly taking the mug away and placing it on the table.

“Fuck Carl, why didn’t you put this down,” Negan grabs for Carl’s hands, carefully inspecting the light burn marks, “you’re gonna get blisters now, baby.”

Carl shakes his head, “it’s ok, I don’t think it’s that bad.” Did he ruin the moment? He probably did. Fuck.

“Negan… what is this? Between us…” Carl looks shyly up at Negan then immediately casts his eyes away when the feeling becomes too intimate again. He wanted to know what Negan really thought about him; if the man liked him or was just playing another game.

Negan was a little shocked by the sudden vulnerable question but he recovered quicklyy, “To be honest, I’m just as fucking lost as you, kid. I’m just winging it. All I know is that I want you, and whatever you’re willing to give me, I'll gladly take. I want to do the most sinful things with you, Carl, but only if you’ll allow me.” Negan’s made up his mind about this awhile ago. He even disbanded his wives. He wanted Carl and only Carl.

Carl shivered at the man’s words, “You can take me, Negan. All of me… I-I don’t hate you anymore, and I don’t hate whatever this is…” Carl continued, “But why—-never mind…”

“Nu uh, honey. What were you gonna say?”

Carl sighs, “Why… why do you like me?” The boy hugged himself self consciously. No, no, Negan was having none of this. Carl was absolute perfection, why couldn’t he see it?

“What the fuck? What the hell isn't there to like about you? You’re badass and hot as fuck, Carl!”

“But I’m a boy, one with a hideous scar at that… You called it disgusting yourself. Did you forget that?”

“No I didn’t forget, and I’m not gonna lie to you, it isn’t the prettiest thing about you, but it’s a battle scar. It’s apart of you and it shows just how much you’ve endured, just how much of a badass you are.” Negan gives him a sweet smile, but it turns devious in the next second, “Plus… all these wrappings here,” Negan brought his hand up to trace at the bandages, “it’s like opening my own Christmas present.”

It was a silent question, and Carl answered by placing his hand on Negan's wrist and nodding. They didn’t need words to convey what they wanted. They just knew.

Carl was more giddy than nervous when Negan started to unwrap him. He felt… excited. Even though Carl was self conscious about his eye, even though he was about to show a very vulnerable side of himself again, he didn’t care. He trusted Negan now. He felt safe with him. All of the nerves he had last time were gone.

“Carl… do I have permission to take you tonight~” Negan whispered sultry in his ear after the bandage was gone. Carl sucked in a deep breath of air. Yes. He wanted that more than anything, but…

“Ah—uhm… I-I don’t have any experience with that…”

Negan wanted to kiss him again with how adorable he was, “Oh, no need to get shy, darling. Daddy’ll teach ya, ok?” Carl blushed when Negan said “daddy.” He didn’t think something like that would turn him on, but then again, he never thought he’d be making out with Negan to begin with. He was learning a lot about himself through the man.

Negan smirks that damned smirk. He must have known how much his words affected Carl, “Let’s move to the bed, sweetheart~”

It was always cold in the Sanctuary, even more so now that winter was upon them. Carl missed Alexandria the most when he felt himself shiver. Back home, it was always warm, and he missed that warmth. But he didn’t miss it right now.

He didn’t feel cold at all.

“Ahn—Negan, n-not there!” Carl screamed as Negan prodded his middle finger against a sensitive spot in his hole. It felt… strange. Good, but different.

“Relax, baby boy. You’re gonna love it.” Negan prodded the spot again, this time applying more pressure.

Carl’s back arched off the bed a little and his legs spread involuntarily as a moan was ripped past his lips. Negan groaned at the sight, not expecting the beautiful display in front of him. Even Carl was surprised by the wanton moan that escaped him. He immediately clasped a hand around his mouth to keep more embarrassing noises from coming out.

Carl never thought in a million years he’d be doing something like this with Negan. Sure, after that passionate kiss they shared on the supply run, Carl will admit he had a few not so innocent thoughts, but his mind never exceeded past Negan and him kissing. This was way more than just kissing, it felt so much more sinful, dirty, and… super fucking hot.

Negan gently removed Carl’s hand from his mouth, “No need for that, baby. Who cares if anyone hears? Let them. They need to know your mine now.” Carl whimpers as Negan punctuates his words with rapid thrusts with his fingers in Carl. Carl hadn’t even noticed Negan added a second one, but oh, did it feel good.

Carl throws his head back as a series of even louder moans escape him. He’s on the brink of tears with how good it feels. Negan just eyes him up in awe, cooing at the boy softly while he moans, “That’s it baby, let it all out. I want to hear all of those beautiful noises~”

Carl’s pretty sure his dick twitched at that. Oh god. What was this man turning him into? He felt like such a slut… and he loved it.

Carl clenched the sheets beneath him in a vice like grip. If Negan kept this up, he was sure he would come untouched. Thankfully, or rather unthankfully, Negan stops his movements completely and pulls his fingers out in place of unbuckling his pants. Carl’s interest peeks at that. He was curious what the man looked like underneath all his clothes.

Carl watched intently as Negan removed his pants and boxers. Carl’s jaw dropped with the sight before him. Negan just grinned and began stroking himself while looking Carl in the eyes. Carl couldn’t help the tiny gasp that escaped him.

The man was well endowed. Of course, Carl was expecting Negan to be bigger than him, but not this big! Would it even fit inside him?

Negan shushed his silent question away, and leaned down over the boy, “It’ll be ok. I’m gonna push inside now, is that alright?”

Carl nods his head. He trusted Negan. Negan pushes in then and Carl grits his teeth. It hurt a lot, he whimpered in pain and clutched the back of Negan’s shoulders for support. Negan tried soothing him by giving him wet kisses up and down his neck while telling him it was ok.

Carl stared into Negan's eyes then. They were illuminated by the light of the tree that was being backed up by the generators they had on. It felt so intimate in that moment. Carl felt his body relax despite the pain and he instantly felt better. He pushed back against Negan's hips, urging the man to push more in. With a groan, Negan takes the hint and pushes the rest of the way in, giving Carl a kiss as they connect fully.

Negan began to rock into the boy slowly, testing the waters. Carl was so tight after all, but just this little friction felt so good. Carl felt the same. He eventually forgot about the pain entirely and a rush of pleasure soon took over. He suddenly couldn’t keep quiet. Negan latched onto his neck, giving him hickeys as he picked up his pace, “You’re being such a good boy, Carl. Santa’s gonna give you a good present~” Negan chuckles in his ear.

Negan just loves to ruin the moment, huh? “Hhn—don’t ruin—Ah! Santa’s image!” Carl was having a hard time catching his breath at this point. Negan was in the same state, he just lets out a breathless laugh at the boy’s reply.

“Negan! Ah, I’m close~” Negan grips the boy’s hips tighter, “Me too, darling. Fuck you’re so tight, baby~”

Negan starts to hit his sweet spot with every thrust. Carl’s legs shake in pleasure. He’s practically screaming at this point, it feels so good! Carl didn’t think it could get any better than this, but then Negan starts to stroke his dick in time with his thrusts. Carl doesn’t make it very far after that. He lets out a loud, sinful moan as he comes on the fourth wank. Negan groans at the sight and starts thrusting even faster, trying to chase his own orgasm, and soon Carl feels the warmth in his belly as Negan blows his load.

They lay there in silence for a minute, both of them catching their breaths and basking in the afterglow of sex. Negan is the first to move, he must know exactly what to do after sex. Carl watches with a sleepy eye as Negan goes into the bathroom and comes back out with a warm, wet washcloth. He wipes both him and Carl clean before throwing the cloth in the hamper and joining Carl in bed again. Negan grabs Carl by the hips and presses the boy against himself while throwing the covers over them. Carl felt happy and content feeling Negan's arms and legs entwined with his own. He felt safe and loved.

Carl went to sleep peacefully that night. He didn’t think about the future or the repercussions this night would cause, no, right now, all he knew was the feeling of Negan’s arms wrapped around him.

Deep down, Carl knew this blissful moment wouldn’t last, and their “relationship” or whatever it was wouldn’t either. As soon as they stepped out of the room—their own little, “Sanctuary,”—the world would remind them why they had to stand opposite of each other.

Carl knew it, but he didn’t need to think about that right now, and he didn’t want to.

* * *

The reality always harsh, but this time Carl learned the most painful way. 

Sanctuary finally fell down, the Saviors begun losing when their leader defeated. His side winning, with the power of people of helped them. 

Carl supposed to feel happy, to feel joy when they no longer bound with the Savior’s rules. But his heart still clenched when he saw wounded Negan in the cells. 

Unable to pretend their relationship was nothing, Carl started to visit Negan in the cell even though Rick never given permission to him to visit their ex-nemesis. 

Negan wasn’t in better mood at all. 

He's still bitter and cruel to Rick and his gang, throwing some sick jokes while riling them up. Mostly they just quit listening to Negan and leave him behind those pesky cells. 

Carl was the only one who can bear Negan for the entire shift, which sometimes he stays longer than he should be but Carl always right on time when it’s his time to guard cells. 

Rick didn’t like how Carl changed, even just a bit. Carl rarely shown attachment to anyone, he only show it to him, Michonne and Daryl. Carl wasn’t easy person to get close to, he got so many barrier around him and even Rick had to reconnect with his son most of the time. 

But Negan. That son of bitch easily get close to Carl. And now the boy attached to Negan just like Duck with her offspring. 

Any regular man wouldn’t notice Carl’s changed behavior. He still remain quiet and calculated person outside, but when he was watching Negan, Carl always shown his real side to him, there’s no fake obedience or smile he put to Rick or the rude and cold stare he given to Saviors. 

Rick saw what Carl usually brought to Negan, books. Rick always tried to check the books before Carl went in, somehow he felt bad to suspect Carl for thinking he might be traitor one day and looking for some secret message that they passed on each other.

But there is nothing in the book. Carl usually brought some novels, magazines, or even comics. The man really had a lot of free time, so he demanded Carl brought something to read if he wanted him to shut up. 

Rick sometimes overheard them, even thought it was a bit rude to Carl, but he couldn’t help but worry about his son who never complained guarding Negan or even asking him to add more shift. He knew the boy hates doing nothing and guarding person would made him bored. 

But Carl never look bored at doing this job, sometimes he went quiet and giving annoyed face when Negan riled him too far, but Carl never said one thing about it. 

“Carl, you don’t have to force yourself to watch that asshole.” Rick decided to talk about it to Carl when they entered their home. 

“It’s okay, Dad. I’m fine,” Carl giving him short answer and ran into the guest room. There was so much stuff in there, Rick didn’t know where he got it, Carl just show up one day with some random car and brought all the stuff, mostly books and some Christmas Decoration inside the empty guest rooms. 

Rick walked to the room while shook his head. “Carl, I know you’re close with Negan, but please, you have to keep distance to that man. What's the point he’s in jail if he’s having fun with you?” 

“What do you mean close?” 

“Don’t bullshitting on me, Carl. I saw you, the way you look at him. Carl. I’m your father. I know when you’re interest in someone—”

“That’s none of your business.”

“Excuse me? You can talk about whatever you can, but Carl, we’re still family, and I’m telling this because I don’t want you to feel hurt one day.” 

“....Still, Dad. This is my life. I choose your side but I’m still—want to be his friend, or someone he could talk to. We’re doing no harm to anyone right now, so please, just—do your thing and I do mine.” 

“Fine, Carl. But let me ask you, did he feel the same way?” 

“.....What?” 

“Did he also thought you as his friend? Or just escaping chance?” 

“I.....” Carl looked down and gulped, he knew the answer. Negan and him just used to be sleeping together, sure they exchange some stuff and heartwarming thing, but right now, everything feel bitter and awkward around them. 

“....I don’t know, Dad. But I still want to do this. He—He’s always asshole to anyone, but—he did give me some reason to survive.” 

Rick decided to say no more to him. It became clear to him what he has been seeking to Carl. 

To be truthfully, Carl never changed in the first place. He has always been a dark and cruel person, deep down in his heart, but Carl choose to be the person who can give care to anyone he thinks he deserves, he still had his humanity side on him. 

Rick decided not to meddle his thing anymore as long he didn’t caught them having sex on the jail. The dirty jokes Negan threw at Rick and Carl occasionally and Carl’s gesture toward Negan were solid proof Carl and Negan did have something more than just buddies. 

* * *

“Your Daddy keep on track on you, huh?” 

Carl ignored Negan’s questions. Usually Negan always insult anything about Rick and also making Carl stupid for choosing Rick’s side. 

“I still had no idea how you can survive until now, having a father like that,” 

“....Me neither.” 

“See? You hate your father, So, why did you choose to support that Prick?” 

“You’re the one who killed our friends.”

“Bullshit. Everyday people die in this era, your gang was no exception.” 

“....I hate you.” 

“Huh, your mouth didn’t say that when it’s pressed on my lips or.... my dick.” 

Carl suddenly stood up and threw the magazines he read it. “Fine, Negan. Tell me something I don’t know and keep going your childish tantrum until one of us going to die. I’m sick of having you keep doing this!” 

Negan didn’t feel guilty or remorse at his anger, he just laughed at his reaction. “Are you seriously mad at me now? Don’t you ever think what you feel on my position?” 

“Oh yeah, how about you in my position? Do you think it’s easy when I tried to spare you and begging you to be alive while everyone wants you dead? Do you think your guys wouldn’t kill my helpless little sister when they had the chance to ‘show your example’ method?” 

“That isn’t going to happen, you know that. You’re the one who double crossed me.” 

“Double crossed you!? You’re the one—who keep treating me as—Your bitch!” Carl decided to throw some books to Negan, any thing beside him. “Y--You’re the one who said to me that—our relationship is meaningless and I’m just having silly crush on you. You’re the one who ruined us. How could I choose your side when you—broke my heart.” 

Negan didn’t have a chance to say back, Carl already sprinted away from the jail cells and didn’t even look back when Negan call his name. 

Negan decided to sat down, he did have small bruises because the books hit his arm, but it doesn’t matter. Carl’s cracked voice and tears shocked him. 

He never seen that young man cried in front of him. He always look fearless and calm, but not like this. 

Now that Carl mention what happen before the war happened. Negan having flashback where Carl decided to approach him and talk about what their relationship after the Christmas incident, the casual fucks happen few times before the Spring comes. 

Negan just thought maybe Carl just confused with feelings of admiration and lust, he never planned to have this bizarre relationship before, but it just happens between them, and Negan thought maybe it’s right time to ended before it’s too late to stop. 

He thought Carl would quickly move on from him since he’s the biggest asshole and no one would ever miss him. 

But he was dead wrong. Knowing it was Carl who are the one who begging to Rick to let him live, which it’s not very him to do it, giving him pain of guilt. 

He always feel bitter, regret and anger to Rick and Carl. He thought he could win this war, but in the end he just a sad man who is living on his own dream until someone wakes him up. And actually making the reality wasn't so bad after all. 

Negan tidied up the books that Carl threw, he never touched the big books before because it was for kid stuff, but he noticed the books it's about Christmas and Fairytales. Negan opened the book and saw how beautiful the pictures inside of it. 

Negan realize Carl brought it to him because he wanted to show that he’s ended up being in prison wasn’t ending after all, it’s his new beginning for new journey. 

Carl wasn’t planned to let him rot in jail, one day he might be out there and start to discover his new self and doing the right thing to survive. 

Carl have plans with Negan, he might have prepared something for him or maybe Carl also want to convince Negan that Carl isn’t just crushing on him, he’s serious about Negan and willing him to give the second chance. 

But now, Negan blew that chance away. 

Because after the incident, Carl never come back before. Rick never told him about why Carl never visited anymore, even Rick said Negan deserve it. Carl’s time ain’t worthy for Negan anymore. 

Which it does making Negan feeling hurt. 

It seems Carl getting tired of him and now he has given up on him. 

Negan begun to lose tracking the time and drown into his lonely cell. 

* * *

Miracle happened when the town suddenly get attacked by something. There was a riot and chaos happened, but there is no one who comes to him and release him. 

Negan wanted to get out but hoping someone would come for him just making him feel more suffered. 

But then, someone did come in, but it isn’t Carl. It was some random scared citizen who approach him and let him out. 

The scared man told him Michonne ask him to release Negan and brought back to Michonne but Negan refuse to cooperate and run away. 

The man can’t catch up with him and Negan went into hiding for several hours. When the road was clear, he began to run. 

But where? 

Suddenly Negan want to approach Carl. It might be a bad idea because Carl might catch him and led him to Michonne, but Negan missing the kid so much and he wanted to meet him again. 

So, he returned to Alexandria. Turn out the place was deserted, there’s no one there and it seems they were hiding from something. 

Negan thought he did a foolish thing to come back and trying to find Carl. But when he found Judith who being lost, Negan decided to bring her and she pointed out where everyone has been going. 

Turns out they all taking a rest on the Hilltop, Negan could see some fallen soldiers who have been hurt, it seems they have dealing with new terror group again. Negan could tell. 

Michonne was relieved when Negan brought Judith and ever since that day, Michonne decided to give Negan second chance, because that was Carl’s thoughts on the first place. 

Negan decided to ask where Carl had been going. 

Michonne said Carl having trip with for weeks ago, they should probably be back in the next few days. Negan surprised that Carl actually rarely staying in Alexandria. 

He knew it since some towns folks gossiping near on Negan’s jails. The old man feels he can’t wait to meet Carl. 

Rick show up out of nowhere, maybe from inspecting the situation around with his horse, and punched Negan, because he thought Negan was escaping. 

Negan didn’t protest or bother to punch back, he just feel maybe he deserve it for being huge asshole to Rick and Carl. Michonne stopped him and told what happened. 

Within an hour, Rick have a new plan and the Alexandrian move back to their town, rebuild the broken fences and try to kill the walkers who roamed around the Alexandria. 

Rick didn’t trust him easily, he still watching Negan for the most time but at least Negan could feel the sun hitting on his skin and breathe in the open sky. He didn’t mind doing labor job with other people who couldn’t stop staring at him, and Rick brought him back to jail when the night come. 

Negan didn’t mind with this new routine after all. But his heart always clenched whenever he remembers the cold stare from the Sheriff’s son. 

* * *

But turn out, Carl still act indifferent toward him, even thought Negan has been out from jail for several days. 

Carl still not approach the old man whenever he was out from the cells. He just giving a short glance and then continue to do his job that wasn’t near at Negan’s labor task, accompanied by Rick, Daryl or Aaron. Depending on who had time for him. 

Negan still likes to throw some rude comments or teasing people, but he never shows any resistance or even planning something, he just doing something out there and went back to his cell like sleeping on the two star motel. 

But then again, Rick could see Negan always stare his son whenever he can be seen by him. Rick should feel disgusted and mad at the old man for giving some odd looks to his son, he supposed to feel relieved when the boy no longer show interest to Negan, but he did feel tiny pity to Negan who had been treated coldly by Carl. 

But he still think Negan deserve it, so he didn’t try to bring Carl’s topic to him, he knew Negan would ended up teasing him or even tell him what Negan did to Carl in the past. Rick doesn’t want to add more reason why he should kill Negan. 

One thing for Rick, the man did changed. He wasn’t bluffing when he offered himself to help them. He had feeling one day Negan and Carl would be back together, either platonic or something more, Rick doesn’t want to know deeper.

But the compatibility between those two was too good. There's no way Negan would stay silent about it, judging how loud his voice. 

As long the man didn’t made any fishy movement, he won’t pestering Carl. 

* * *

Carl wished he shouldn’t stay too long in Alexandria and join Daryl who wanted to explore the new place, but the man didn’t allow him since this time Daryl wanted to go with Carol. 

He should feel happy when Negan was out here, still surviving. It was his wish every night he pray to God to let him out from the cells, but right now it feels like a nightmare since Negan never ever take off his eyes from him. 

He feel so stupid. 

Carl can’t resist the man either. His presence always been powerful. He didn’t look thin like before, and that smile. 

That smile. 

Carl always melted to his smile and laughter. 

Carl has always been careful when he was outside, he chooses to guard post where Negan won’t able to reach him and return to his home when Negan entered his cell.

But today he was careless, he didn’t check Rick’s schedule and walking to small pit of garden and picking some flowers for Judith. 

“I didn’t know you were trying to be a florist,” Negan comment on him non chantingly and whistling. 

“Fuck off, Negan.” Carl tried to look calm, but he was panicked. He trying to find person who guard Negan but nobody look after him. 

“Chill, Kid. I’m not here to kill you or anything, I’m just bored at the cell and turn out nobody lock me in.” Negan swiftly walk around Carl. He didn’t bring any weapons or stuff, so he did mean no harm to him. 

“But people would still shoot you if you’re alone like this.” Carl tried to make him go away, but he couldn’t think any one good reason why. 

“Aww, Thanks for the attention, Carl.” Negan winked at him as he walked closer toward him. 

Carl didn’t know what to do with Negan, he didn’t plan to meet him sooner like this, so he decided to dismiss himself without saying anything. But Negan quicker than him. 

“Where are you going, boy? We need to talk.” Negan hold his hand as Carl take turn. 

“There’s nothing we can talk.” 

“Ouch, that harsh. So, our past relationship was nothing?” Negan taunted him. Wanted to see a reaction. 

Carl can’t get let this off, he turned to him and glared at him. “You’re the one who say that.” 

Negan didn’t reply back immediately, but he stared Carl’s eyes deeply, turn out, the man just wanted his sole attention. “Glad you’re finally look at me.”

Carl blushed, it was a trap. Carl wished he could just push the man and ran away, but he knew, sooner or later, he will need to face this with Negan. 

“Look, Carl. I’m sorry.” Negan said with soft tone. “I really regret for saying that, but you have to know, I said it because I don’t want you regret choosing me and abandon your family just for asshole guy like me, Carl.” 

Carl knew that, he saw how Negan’s reacted when Carl told him he hated him and wanting him to die, Negan still have emotion left in his eyes. 

“I’m sorry for being bitter in the prison too.... it took a long time for me to adjust to this—new lifestyle. Turns out, it wasn’t bad as you said.” 

Carl still said nothing to him. 

“I want you back, Carl.” Negan shows no hesitation. “I want you to come at me and told me about those star shits you like and we can hang out in somebody’s house rooftop and trying to find Sirius and Andromeda. Heck, I would even find Telescope for you.” 

Tempting, but Carl still doubting Negan’s sweet talk, even thought there’s no reason for Negan to have ulterior move to Carl, he’s pretty much free and he could fuck anyone if he want, but he still ended up chasing some broken ugly man. 

“I want us to have a serious relationship—a healthy one.” Negan brushed Carl’s cheek. “So, I would make you feel happy.” 

“You’re sure about that?” Carl look warily at him. 

“Yeap. 100% sure.” Negan smiled, giving thumb to him. 

Carl went quiet for a second, he wanted to believe him, but he can’t catch the whole reason why Negan doing this. 

“Tell me, why does it have to be me?” 

“Because--It’s you, Carl. There's nobody else but you.” 

Carl suppose not to feel anything, he should move on from Negan ever since he stopped visiting him in jail. But right now, his heart racing so fast and his eyes feel hot. 

It feels like his stupid little fantasy actually coming true. Hoping the man he loved actually loved him back. 

“I--If you ever told me you want to break up with me or leave me, I fucking kill you.” Carl said before he let himself getting embraced by Negan. 

“Yeah, Kid. You can do anything you want to me, Daddy always ready.” he said before giving kiss to Carl. Thankfully, Rick wasn’t around so he would get pissed to hear Negan’s nickname himself as Carl’s Daddy. 

Carl didn’t push the man when he feel the lips he missed brushed against his. He let himself drowned of his touch until Michonne cleared her throat and glared at them. 

Carl could imagine he would get lectured both from Rick and Michonne, but this time Carl won’t stay silent and he would declare he indeed still wanted to be with Negan after all this time. 

* * *

Winter is coming. 

Carl never been this excited before. Usually he always feel grumpy for the boring job gathering wood for firewood in their home and extra supply in case the storm was getting worse. 

But right now, Negan practically a free man and nobody ever question about him when he was outside. Surprisingly, Negan getting along with Gabriel, Eugene and Aaron. Carl occasionally saw them talking and having a great time like just some old neighbors. 

But what makes Carl excited is the big tree with a star on the top of it. Carl never expressed himself about how he likes Christmas and Stars, but ever since Negan likes to hang out in his home and blabbering about Carl’s stuff. 

Pretty much the whole Alexandria knew about it. 

Rick and Michonne actually making civil talks to Negan, probably because Negan visited their home too often even Rick stop getting annoyed and fuss about Negan because the man just never quit to pay attention to his son. 

And Michonne never said anything because Negan didn’t make any stupid remarks or insulting jokes, because he knew his dick won’t survive with that katana sword. Negan keep calling it samurai sword, but Carl keep correcting him. 

“You’re such a geek,” he said, wishing to give some kisses on the young man’s lips if his parents weren't in the living room. Carl snorted and continue to read his favorite book. 

Judith began to talk, Carl lost keeping track of her age, but Judith become talktive whenever Negan visiting and playing with Judith, the man really loved spending time with his little sister, sometimes Carl feel jealous because Judith could freely get carried by Negan in front of Rick and Michonne. 

Carl wanted to be spoiled with Negan, the man really knew how to make him feel good and contempt, but Rick still not trusting Negan and Carl having ‘time alone’ in his house. Something that he won’t ever negotiate with his life. 

Carl keeping track on Calendar, Christmas is coming soon and he has a plan to celebrate it on his home with Negan. 

Turn out, Negan planned him faster and already ask Rick and Michonne’s permission. 

“You did what?” Carl surprised when the man give the news when they shoveling snow in the road. 

“Yeap, I ask Rick to let me decorate your house, only in the living room, and your room of course.” 

“That wasn’t surprise, you Idiot. Now I know you’re just doing decorate stuff,” Carl rolled his eyes, his plan failed. 

“Nah, you will be surprised how I decorate it, and of course, I prepare you some present, Baby.” Negan smirked at him while groping his waist. 

“Hmmm, I’m not sure it just some silly old book or something kinky,” Carl licked his lips, it feels so long since he could have sex with Negan. Sometimes, he could sneak into Negan’s home and having hot sex with him, but he couldn’t stay until morning so he need to get back, which sometimes exhausted for him. 

Negan just laughed and then continue to finish their job. 

Carl was asked to stay outside home until 6pm, before that Michonne said she wanted to stay at Hilltop for helping Maggie, she did ask Rick to join her, but the man still wary about Negan, especially the man wanted to spend the night at his home, so Rick stayed. 

Rick probably sensing Negan would fuck Carl at the living room if he wasn’t there. 

Carl waited outside and decided to have a talk with Enid, who’s getting boyfriend and then he talked to few Alexandrian before going back. 

Negan stood out in the terrace as Carl approach to him. “Get ready to get mind blown?” 

Carl just rolled his eyes as Negan opened the door. 

It was beautiful. 

A fresh beautiful looking tree with some sparkle ornaments, while the whole living room was on with lighting equipment. “How did you turn on the electricity?” 

“I found old generator yesterday but it only lasted one day, so I decided to use this for Christmas, I know this is selfish but hey I’m the one who found it and it didn’t won’t help much either.” 

“Yeah, firewood still good. But still, I haven’t seen this stuff for long.” Carl checking out the ornaments, few of them were new. 

“Oh, I found it in the nearby department store, turn out it have Christmas decoration,” Negan smirking as he watched how Carl excited to examine one by one. 

“Did Dad help this?” 

“Nah, of course not. But now he’s in the kitchen preparing for dinner.” Negan said as he stood up and took some cookies to eat. 

Carl still awe for the Christmas tree, Judith was really happy when she saw it, Carl showed her the picture books of Santa and Christmas, Judith laughing at the funny drawing. 

Rick called them to eat at the dinner table, and of course Negan eat with them. While Carl soothing Judith, making her into sleepy after eating, he put down her sister on her room. 

When he got back, Negan was having a conversation with Rick while drinking wine, Negan offered to him but Carl refused, he didn’t want to be under the influence of alcohol today. 

He was a bit disappointed because he hoped he could have time alone with Negan this night, but Negan actually spend effort to get Rick’s good side. 

Carl almost dozed off at the living room and then Negan approached him. “Hey kiddo, sorry took hours, your father finally wasted,” Negan said as he smirked. 

“What? What did you do?” 

“Oh, just small doze to make him snoring,” Negan winked at him. 

Carl was surprised, but he didn’t feel any red flag for him. “Don’t tell me, you did that for—”

“Yep. Let's go to your room, Darling.” 

Carl hurriedly ran into his room and he was amazed to what Negan done to his room. It was more clean and the room filled with lights and there was huge teddy bear on the corner while his bed has new sheet and bedcover. 

“It looks really good, Negan.”

“Yeap. I actually want to give you better bed, but, Rick won’t even allowed new bed to be here just for us having sex on the top of it,” Carl laughed at that idea. “This is more than enough for me,”

“Oh yeah, we haven’t done the main course,” Negan purred at him as his hand trailed down at Carl’s body, touching his sensitive part to make him aroused. 

Carl like this is where it’s going, he’s hoping Judith won’t suddenly awake or Rick’s sleeping pill went off, for better measure, Carl locked his door before jumping into Negan and undress the man. 

Both of them kissed and sucking each other tongue impatiently while undress their clothes one by one, the cold weather didn’t make them shudder, their lust has been keep hold for so long and now they’re going to release them all. 

Carl bit jumped when Negan kissed his nipple and play with it, sometimes giving playful bite, making Carl fully hard. He likes how Negan touched his dick too. 

Carl decided to unbuckle Negan’s belt and then giving the man a hot present he deserves. 

“Getting impatient unwrapping your present, Kiddo?” Negan smirked as he let the boy eagerly giving him a head. 

Carl didn’t replied back as he undress Negan’s boxer. Turn out Negan also fully hard. Negan want to slap Carl with his dick and making him to swallow the whole thing, but today he decided to be gentle to the young man and let him do his way. 

Carl was enthusiastic when he pumped Negan’s dick and began to lick it, he licked from the tip and slowly sucked the head, making the older man keep whispering “Oh, yeah.” as the man’s hand rested on his head. 

Carl waste no time as he picked more pace and decided to try swallow Negan’s dick. It's kind of huge to his small mouth and Carl almost choking if he’s too hasty. 

“You’re so good at this, Carl.” Negan praised him as he rubbed Carl’s head while moving his hips slowly, to get deeper on Carl’s throat. 

Carl knew Negan never been impatient at blowjob, he loved to make him doing deep throat, this time he did it without getting choked in the middle as Negan getting closer to the climax. 

Carl could feel the warm liquid stuff spreading inside his throat as Negan climax while moaning his name. 

“You take the whole damn thing,” he said, impressed by Carl’s improvement, usually the poor boy ended up choked out before he could climax. 

“Now you're a naughty boy list, Carl. Daddy gotta punish you,” Negan said as he approach Carl and spread the buttcheeks. 

“Or reward me with good fuck.” Carl replied back while he spread his legs. 

“Cheeky brat.” Negan chuckled as he giving a massage on Carl’s hole. 

Judging how easily his finger went in, it seems Carl already prepared his butt before today, and Negan just turned on by it, imagining Carl masturbate while thinking of him. 

This time, Carl was the one who impatient, he keep saying to add more finger and now asking his dick to enter, Negan always want Carl prepared at the maximum so he won’t feel a single pain, but it seems Carl missed his dick too much, Negan just gonna give it. 

“Ne--Negan, I want your dick.” He said boldly as he moaned when Negan touched his spot with his finger. 

“Getting so impatient, eh? Don’t regret if this feel painful,” Negan said as he pumped his cock and giving more lubrication to it. 

Carl was hoping his loud moan won’t make his father awake on downstairs, he couldn’t keep it low when he could feel Negan’s hard dick entering him. 

Carl get used by Negan’s rough sex, but when Negan giving him a gentle and slow fuck, Carl practically lose his mind, because the man was so good making him feel complete yet impatient. 

Negan also aroused by Carl’s whimper and moaning, begging him to fuck faster while Negan just want to treat him gently this night. 

“Boy, you’re so naughty are you, even a gentle fuck won’t satisfy you,” 

“I--it just if you—fuck me like that—I'm losing my mind—Ah!” Negan hit hi prostate, his ultimate weakness. 

“You want me to be rough, boy? Too bad, today I just want you to give good gentle fuck from this Big Ol Daddy,” he said, even thought he did want to plow his ass hard as fuck as he could. 

But today he feel bit sentiment and he wanted to give Carl slow fuck. 

But when they both having climax together, Carl ended up Negan begging to fuck him more, which made Negan changed his mind and giving him rougher sex until the teen satisfied drying up all his cum. 

“Aahn--Daddy—I'm going to come,” Carl wrapped his leg around Negan as he moved his hips faster. When Carl calling Negan his loveable nickname, it shown that Carl already lost in his blissful pleasure. 

“Me too, darling.” Negan grunted as he pounded Carl’s ass harder than before until they both climax again. Negan lost counting how many rounds they did it, but it seems Carl stopped getting hard again and beg more ride, Negan could breathe at least. 

Carl never imagine that he would have hot sex with endless pleasure in his bed. Usually he just cried in his bed or having wet dream of Negan when the man in the prison.

But now, the man was freed and he even admit he’s in love with Carl and pouring his love with loving way and sexual way. Carl couldn’t ask more better present at this. 

“This is the best Christmas I ever had,” Carl said as he looked at the man who also lying on his bed. “Yeah, me too, Carl.” 

“Really?” Carl turned into his face and look at him curious. “I thought your past life was better than this.”

“Seriously, kid? I don’t even remember how my past life like, I feel living in this kind of world wasn’t bad after all.” Negan chuckled as he kissed Carl’s forehead. 

“You probably need to wait a long time to date me,” Carl said, imagining that Negan ended up as his gym teacher and they need to wait or hide their dangerous relationship, Rick totally would against them. Not that different from today, but past life was more conservative. 

“That’s the point kiddo, I do like to see you being badass again out there,” Negan said, he has no attachment to past life, he feel enough with current life, even the Saviors era didn’t made him feel slightly regret. 

Carl rolled over to his side and hugging his waist. 

“Can we spend night more like this...?” Carl whispered, he loved to be in Negan’s arm and falling asleep. He used to sleep in Negan’s bed a lot back in Sanctuary and he actually stopped having nightmares. 

“Of course, Carl. Anytime you want,” Negan said, as he also drifted into sleep, enjoying their silent moment of happiness. 

He replied ‘Love you too,’ when Carl mumbled ‘Love you,’ before they both sleep. 

* * *

Rick woke up in the sunny day. The sun was up and there’s no storm, when he looked at the window, he didn’t expect the beautiful view of Alexandria while it snows. 

Rick went down and having breakfast with Michonne, oddly Carl and Judith already up and they’re getting ready with full coat and gloves with boots.

“Where are you going, guys?” Rick curiously approach them. “Oh, Judith want to build a snowman and I just want to help her.” Carl said. 

Before Rick could say anything, Negan suddenly appear, also he was prepared with the blue jacket coat and beanie hat. “Hey, kids, ready for a snowball fight?” 

“Yay! Fight!” Judith exclaimed while clapping, Carl laughed at him. “You’re definitely the kid one. Who the hell getting excited for snowball fights?” 

“Oh, you don’t know how I am good at this.” Negan smirked, throwing a very clear loving expression to Carl. 

Rick wanted to puke, he never gets used to see both of them throwing an obvious flirt at each other in front of him. Seems they were tired to keep it low and just do whatever they can. 

“If Judith crying, I’m gonna punch you, Negan.” Rick said before he takes a sip on his coffee. Michonne just amused to see Rick and Negan can talk without fussing about small stuff. 

“Roger, Sherriff.” He winked as he led Carl and Judith into the snowy garden. 

Rick decided to walk and watch them closely. He never thought he would let his ex-nemesis dated his son and now playing snowballs fight with his daughter in his garden. 

The man maybe still an arse and loud, but he never shown any threat after few months living with them. Negan always bold to say directly to him the things he want. Negan was no longer sleep in the cell, he was given to small house that wasn’t far from the rest of Alexandria houses. 

Negan also never interfere with his leadership in the Alexandria or try to move to another place, he just stays there, mostly doing some planting and gardening, and spending time with Carl. 

Nobody in this whole town didn’t know about this odd couple. The bad and hurtful gossip always lingering around them, but they paid no attention to it. Negan feel enough to survive being civil and stay with Carl. 

Rick probably should let Carl live with the man, he would be over 21 years old soon and Negan actually can be capable figure. It just needs time to prove him. 

“Ah, I’m thirsty,” Carl went back as he passed Rick. “You’re not joining us, Dad?” Carl said as he took off his scarf. “Nah, I’m good,” he said, he prefers having fist fights with Negan.

Carl nodded as he walked inside, turn out the coat didn’t cover Carl’s neck and Rick saw a huge hickeys and some small hickeys around his neck. 

It look fresh, and as he remembered, Rick did fall asleep two days ago and Michonne staying in Maggie’s place for help. The last thing he remembered he was drinking with Negan. 

‘Don’t tell me they did it in my home!?’ 

Rick probably let Carl stayed with Negan sooner before they doing anything funny at Carl’s room. But before that, Negan owe him one big ball snow thrown at his face.  
  


The end 

**Author's Note:**

> HUGE THANKS TO My partner in crime and bestie beta reader : Issa_saiko 
> 
> who never stop helping me and always do her best to proofreading my story, and it turn out the story more fantastic than before <3 
> 
> also thanks to you guys who read until the end, I hope I can write more for this ship <3 Have a nice holiday !!


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